What Are the Traits of a Successful Multigenerational Generation Family?

• They know the family story. They know who they are.

• They are clear on their values and live them out.

• They understand trust is important within the family and reinforce that through words and   actions.

• They are clear on the direction they want to go as a family and move in that direction.

• Each successive generation is empowered to design their own destiny, building on the strengths and values of the prior generations.

• They value family unity and affirm each family member, but don’t endorse behavior contrary to family values.

• They intentionally nurture good relationships amongst all members of the family, regardless of differences.

• They make sure spouses of family members, and adopted children, feel like family by blood.

How to Develop the Traits of a Successful Multigenerational Generation Family?

• They  know the  family  story. They  know  who  they  are.  Capture  and  tell  the family story through interviewing family members. Provide easy access to videos and written content telling the family story. Ask questions such as, “How did our great grandfather start the business?” Don’t tell only the hero stories. Tell the whole story, warts and all, to communicate that success is possible even with struggles and imperfection.

• They are clear on their values and live them out. Discover through stories how the family’s values came about. What values drove the family to believe in their ability to create something worthwhile? What anchored them, keeping them from being destroyed when the storms came? Retell the stories over and over and over to reinforce the values.

• They understand trust is important within the family, and reinforce that through words and actions. Seek to know the expectations  of  family members  and consider how those expectations can be incorporated into how the family lives out their values. Make it clear if it isn’t possible to include certain expectations within how the family interacts and deploys their resources.

• They are clear on the direction they want to go as a family and move in that direction. They establish a family compass – mission, vision, purpose, values. This provides direction. Then they frequently reassess, how are we doing related to our family compass? Where do we need to make course corrections?

• Each successive generation is empowered to design their own destiny, building on the strengths and values of the prior generations. They engage in open communication about honoring differing values and priorities amongst immediate family sub-units, while being respectful of the larger family’s values.

• They value family unity and affirm each family member, but don’t endorse behavior contrary to family values. They are clear about family values but recognize not everyone in the family will enthusiastically endorse all of the family values. With love they affirm each family member, while not endorsing behavior that goes against family values.

• They intentionally nurture good relationships amongst all members of the family, regardless of differences. They look for ways to connect and enjoy being together. If there is not a good relationship with adult children, they look for and act on ways to rebuild the relationship. They are persistent until the relationship is restored, no matter how long it takes.

• They make sure spouses of family members, and adopted children, feel like family by blood. They embrace family unity and affirm everyone, making sure to include spouses of family members, and those who are adopted, in all gatherings and family discussions.

 Other Pivotal Family and Business Principles Discussed:

• How to make sure company and family values are not just marketing statements but are used as guiding accountability for the family and the business.

• How to make sure the direction you set on paper show up in the decisions and actions of the family and the business?

• How to keep the extended family pulling together for the good of everyone over multiple generations.

• How to handle family shareholders who cause disunity in the business or the family.

• How to remove family shareholders or terminate family employees and still maintain relationships.

• How to make sure your family business is headed in the right direction to get to the desired destination over multiple generations.

• How to educate all family members and shareholders about the family business by telling stories…warts and all… not just the hero stories.

• Defining responsibilities and communication lines between the owners group, family members the shareholders group and the board.

• Using a balanced scorecard that measures financial results, shareholder satisfaction, risk tolerance and stewardship of family values.

• How to build legacy with divorced parents. 

  • Don’t focus on the dirty laundry. Instead focus on the story you want your grand kids to know about.  Start where you are and create a new branch in the family tree.  Take the long view and determine what you can do today that could positively influence your generations 20 years from now. 

• How to integrate next gen spouses in family business and legacy processes.

  • Empowering each generation to be architects of their own destiny while at the same time building on the values of the prior generation.

• How to transfer stories, principles and values to next generations.

  • Developing family traditions and routines that make the family and its values attractional to future generations.